Astral Log: Friday July 29th, 2011

It’s been a while since I’ve been able to get to the vibrational state, I was worried that I had lost my ability. Anyhow, woke up at about 3:30, read the internet for about an hour, then went back to bed. I gained consciousness, and found myself deep in the vibes. They were really strong, the auditory hallucinations were amazing too, it was like a great thunder storm, or when you rattle a piece of sheet metal. I pulled my astral hands out. I had them in front of me in prayer position. I watched them sway back and forth. Then, I dunno what happened, I was pulled back in, I awoke. I was exhausted, I decided I’d try and hope back in. I shut my eyes and before I could even start to focus on the energy I was back in the vibes once again. However, they started fading, fading, fading away. I guess I missed my wave. That’s ok, just know that I can back to the door way it good enough for now. It’s been weeks.

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Astral Log: June 25th, 2010 – Encounter with an Angel

I decided to project during the day.  This was the first time I had done so since I was a teenager.   Back then I would project almost daily after school.  I would be so exhausted, it was easy.  I decided to project during the day thinking it would be a more positive experience than my more recent attempts at night.  I have been on hiatus for a while, mainly because I encountered some dark entities that scared me.  However, over the past couple weeks I have really been working on bringing myself into a more positive being, and had been focusing on positive energy which I think helps protect you.

It was after lunch, and I needed a break.  I’ve been learning a new programming language which has been a bit of a challenge.  It’s one that I am not very interested in, but I need to learn it for work.  I’ve been dragging my feet on it, and it has become mentally tiring.  Needless to say, I needed a little break.  I decided I would relax with a little nap, a siesta, and decided it would be a good opportunity to practice astral projection.  I reached the vibrations almost instantly.

As usual I felt them in my feet first, then became very heavy, very fast. Without even trying hard, I was able to lift myself from my body – very fast – completely out.  It was as if I just popped right out.  I paid no attention to the auditory hallucinations, as sometime I find them frightening and distracting.  But not this time, I hardly noticed them.   I was out, floating in my room.  I was looking at my physical self laying in bed, my cat next to me chillin’.  It was a little fuzzy, but visible enough.

While I floated there marveling at what was happening, I noticed another entity:  a small white entity, pure white, angelic in shape.  In relation to my physical self, it was about two feet in height. The shape was angelic, almost like a christmas sugar cookie.  It was a pure white self-contained energy swirl, very beautiful and radiant.  It noticed my astral self but it seemed much less interested in the astral me, than I was interested in it.  It floated towards me physical body very slowly peaceful.  I watched in amazement.  I knew it was not a negative entity.  It got closer to my physical face.  This made me nervous because I was feeling protective of my physical body, even from an entity that had no negative vibrations.   I was like, “Shoo, shoo,” waving my astral arms towards it.  I was almost laughing because here I was floating above myself, trying to shoo an angel away from my face. Shoo, shoo.

At this point I got too animated and broke my trance, snapping me back into my body.  I laid in bed awake, feeling the energy that was pulsing through my entire body, amazed at what just happened. I petted the cat, got up, and went back to work.

I learned a lot from this one experience.   The main being that we attract what we are seeking, or what we have become.  I don’t know about you, but I am choosing the light.

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Driving a Motor Bike in Aegina

Took a break from the protesting and rioting and took a day trip to Aegina with my wife. We rented a motor bike to explore the island.
The music is some tracks we made about 6 years ago.

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Just when you think you’re being original

So I started the /r/rawfoods a couple of weeks ago. Well now I’ve found out that /r/raw already exists. So there you have it, the official raw foods reddit.

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Lucid / Astral Log Sunday June 19: Invoking Astral Projection from a Lucid Dream

So there I was back in high school.  I was in science lab, working with my lab partner.  What we were working on was not apparent, nor was my lab partner.  Someone came to our lab table and asked if they could use our table to work on one of their projects.  We obliged.  I went walking back to the back of the class room.

As I walked by, Screech from “Saved by The Bell” went limping by on crutches.  I walked towards the back of the class, and I felt one of my crowns in the back of my mouth had come loose.  I was wiggling it, and I was nervous that it was going to fall out and I would lose it permanently.  I also felt my front tooth was starting to loosen.  As I was assessing the situation of my teeth by wiggling them, they fell out onto the floor.  Oh no.  I looked on the floor, and it was covered with confetti, making it a chore to find my two teeth.  I searched, and I found them.  I contemplated skipping out of school to get some Fixodent, but I didn’t want to risk detention.  I then contemplated asking around to see if any of the teachers had any.  However I realized that the only teacher that might have any was on the other side of the school.  So it just wasn’t worth the effort.  I placed them back into my mouth, and they fit there loosely.

I walked back to my lab table with hopes of chatting up the girl that was using the table.  I approached her from behind.  She had a pretty black dress on and her hair was grey, but there were still strands of black in it.  I was intrigued by the mysteries of older women.  I think she felt me standing behind her, contemplating my approach.  She slowly turned her head around towards me, and right as I was just getting a view of her face, I noticed how ocean blue and bright her eyes were.  They made me extremely nervous, so I turned away quickly and decided to go make sure my teeth were straight.  I ran to the huge mirror in the back of the room.  I looked at them.  They were a wreck.  I was so embarrassed.

I tried adjusting them, then I noticed that underneath my top row of teeth was something I’ve never noticed before.  It was a thick pink gum line on the bottom row of my teeth. What the heck?  That’s not how teeth are supposed to look.  I started to peel it away, and I was horribly grossed out at what was going on in my mouth.  Then I became lucid.  I was like, I’m dreaming… I’m dreaming… I AM DREAMING!  Right at that moment, I heard a very loud sound, like when you turn on the radio and it is cranked up full blast, and you immediately have to turn it off.  It startled me, and I was jilted back slickly.  I was like, fuck, that was loud.  Then I looked around.  I was no longer in school, I was in an empty room, nothing there.  I was white.  It was my canvas. I was buzzing with glee.

What did I want to create?  And guess what was the first thing that came to mind?  Back to the gutter, sigh….  I mentally commanded, “Bitches Now.”  A bed appeared behind me, and then a door appeared, where at any moment an army of women were going to come marching in.  Then I thought, fuck this.  I need to do some scientific experimentation.  So then I started thinking “Astral Project -now.  I want to leave my body.”

And there I was surrounded by an all-white glow.  I was floating downward, I was flailing my arms and legs, but I was slowly floating downward, downward into my body.  I was conscious back in my body:  I was in the vibrational state. Not thinking rationally at this point.  I hastily tried the rope technique.  I don’t know why, because it always fails me. I dunno, it just popped into my mind. I just tried and tried, not slowly, but very fast. I think I was just so excited that I was able to invoke this from my dream, that I threw all my separation techniques out the window. I feel know I should have hung out in the vibrational state a little longer and just let things happen.

I decided I would call on my higher self to pull me out, but then I decided maybe that would not be a good idea because I still didn’t know if it was really me or a bad entity.  So then I tried for Michael the Archangel, and then Jesus to pull me out, but I realized I was just being silly and that I should not bother those guys unless I was in danger.  So I struggled a little more, and decided that I had had enough and gave up.  I woke up.  The energy was pooling in my hands, which is pretty normal, but it was also pooling in my cheeks which was a new sensation for me.

This was the first time I tried to go from a Lucid dream to an Astral Projection.  I plan on trying to this every time now when I become lucid within a dream.  I just need to remember not to use the rope technique and to stick with the rollover technique because that was the one that worked last time.  Also, another thing I noticed was there were no audio hallucinations.  I was waiting for the creepy footsteps, or the voices; I was inviting them, but they were not there this time.

I think this took less than 30 minutes because I woke up around two am and was up until about four am.  Then I woke up again around 4:30 or 4:40 am.  I need to start doing better time tracking.

It’s 5:31 now.  The sun is coming up.  I am a little awake, but I am going to try one more time.

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Dream Log June 16th: Oh no, Nazis!

I was in Germany.  Somewhere on the coast.  It was brisk but not too cold.  I was walking down the street.  People were celebrating, and there was a parade going on.  On further inspection I realized I was in Nazi Germany.

Great, I thought, I am going to be killed at any moment.  I decided the best thing I could do would be to act naturally and pretend I was a tourist.  I was.  I walked down the middle of the street.  There were people running around and a grandstand.  I was walking towards the coast.  I was crossing a bridge.  One side of the bridge was lined with cannons.  They were shooting them straight into the air, letting the cannonballs fall straight down on the ground. Laughing as each one impacted the bridge.  I kept walking, casually avoiding falling cannonballs.

There was a museum ahead of me.  It was build on the coast, waves smashing into it.  It was an impressive structure.  It was made out of huge pillars, and the walls were made of glass. You could see straight through it from the beach to the ocean behind it.  There was no way I could go in there – they were asking for ID from everyone.  To the left were three large submarines parked on the beach.  Futuristic submarines, I had never seen anything like them.  To the left of the submarines was a huge statue of combat boots.  Big and impressive standing right on the shoreline, facing the ocean.  Letting the world know that they were lining up to conquer them.

I decided I would take a peek in the submarine.  I climbed up onto the submarine in the middle as it looked the most impressive.  I was at the top, and I opened the hatch.  I looked down inside.  It was dark and red and made submarine noises.  There were voices inside.  I did not want an altercation so I closed the hatch.  I then started to walk towards the boots.

I’m not sure why I had this dream.  I think it’s the first time I’ve dreamed about Nazis probably because I was watching “What We Do Is Secret,” and Darby Crash was talking about Hitler and fascism.

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Dream Log June 16: Rolling with The Cream

I was driving in the car with my friend Fred.  We just pulled onto the on-ramp of a highway.  It was a big spiraling ramp.  We drove around it and around it, building up momentum until we could not stay on the road any more.  And then we plummeted off the side.

At first we were scared, but once we realized we were in no danger, we relaxed and began to totally enjoy the off-road ride.  We went cruising through the field for awhile.  Slightly worried we were going to get nabbed by the police, we drove back onto the road and pulled over at an apartment complex.  I knew a place we could hang out.  OK.

We got out of the car and walked up the stairs to an apartment.  A woman in lingerie answered the door.  She said, Come in.  She broke down the rates.  Ninety dollars for a massage.  I told here I did not want a massage, and I just wanted to sleep for an hour.  She was like, that is fine.  I laid down on the floor and crashed.  When I woke up I realized it was way more than an hour.  I asked how long I was out, and Fred told me seven hours.  Fuck, I thought, I had shit to do.  The madam came at me and told me it would still only be ninety dollars. I reached in my pocket and pulled out a stack of euros.  I had no dollars, only euros.  I offered her 100 euros, but she told me she only accepted dollars. What an idiot, I thought, did she not know the current exchange rate? I told her I had no dollars and that I would have to come back with them later.  She was surprisingly cool with that.  I was walking down the stairs.  I saw the car we arrived in, but was confused that my bike was not strapped to the roof.

“Where is my bike,” I asked.

“We left it on Grove, I’ll give you a ride.”

Jesus, I thought, I have to get back in that crazy car?  Oh well.

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Dream Log June 16th: A Phone Interview with Ian

There I was in a small efficiency apartment (I can only imagine it was in Maryland – I am assuming College Park), very tiny… there was a bed, a tv, a table, and a small closet.  Two doors: one exit and one to the kitchen.  Ian Mackaye was there; it was his apartment.

I was called to the kitchen.  I went into the kitchen.  It was very small.  Ian’s parents were in the kitchen.  His dad had a stubbly beard and wore a wife beater, a cigarette at the corner of his mouth.  He was berating his wife. “Dammit honey, fix that shit now. I need my shows.”

His wife was in a white robe and curlers, also smoking.  She had a lower cupboard open, leaning into it, front-wise, like she was pissing.  What the fuck, I thought. I turned my attention back to the husband.  He directed me towards the fridge.  I walked towards the fridge, I opened it up, and I reached for a beer from the bottom compartment.  The father was like no, no.  Fix the damn thing so I can watch my shows.  Jesus, I was confused.

Then I saw it. On the back of the wall towards the floor, a fuse that had blown out.  I started to slide the fridge over to make room to reach the fuse.  As I was moving the fridge over, I noticed a toilet in the cabinet where Mrs. Mackeye was pissing.  Damn, these people are poor, and efficient. Just as I made enough room, Mrs. Makeye elbowed me out of the way.  “Let us have a look. Let us have a good look,” she said while leaning down to inspect the fuse.   She reached down and removed a cockroach from the fuse.  There was a small spark, then the television on the counter came back on.  “muurYeaaa,” the husband exclaimed.  “Woooooo, would you look at the size of that!?” She exclaimed, examining the cock roach.  OK, I was weirded out at this point, and slowly retreated, stepping backwards into the main room.  They didn’t even notice I was leaving.

Back in the main room, Ian was there.  I tried to talk to him, but he said he would only talk to me via telephone, and that it would cost me $20 an hour.  Jesus, I thought, why do all my childhood heroes turn out to be such fucking hucksters?  Anyway, I wrote down his phone number.  I was tired and asked him if I could crash.  He said no and told me that if I wanted I could take a sleeping mat from the closet, but that I had to go now.  So I took a mat and left.

While I was walking, I pulled out my cell phone and called him, “Hey dood, what’s up? This is John.” “Oh yeah, hold on one second,” he said. An automated voice came on, “Please enter your credit card number.” Seriously? I thought.

I went through the motions.  Typed in my number, and he came back on the phone. He wasn’t the animated guy I had seen in the videos:  He was very lethargic and out of it.  I really wanted to talk to him about the DC hardcore scene back in the day, but I knew he probably had been bored to death of that subject and rather that he talk about something he wanted to talk about.  So I asked him, “Ian, tell me something that you really want to talk about.”

He said, “Oh good, let me tell you about the time I checked myself into rehab.”

“For drugs?” I asked.

“No, you idiot, I’m straight-edge.  Duh.”

Oh yeah, I knew that.

He went on, “I was a poor boy, I lived alone with my mom….  I had some issues that I knew I needed to work through so I decided I was going to check myself into a rehab facility for six months.”

“What kind of issues?” I pried.

“Personal ones,” he shot back.  He went on to tell me that he checked himself into a big fancy brick hospital to work on his mental conditions.  However the rehabilitation was cut short when the hospital did a background check on him. “Yeah, they called around. Found out my mother was poor shit.  Found out she was a cleaning lady at the Army hospital, and that we didn’t have a pot to piss in.  So they cut me off.  After one fucking day.  One fucking day, can you believe that?  I needed a good solid six months to get my head on straight, and those fucks cut me off at one day.”

“Jesus dood, that sucks.”

“That’s why I hate insurance companies now.  They don’t do shit, you pay into them for years and years, and when you really need them, they fuck you.  I fucking hate them.”

I was walking across the University of Maryland campus now. Right through a frat boys’ wiffle ball game.  Talking away, no one seemed to mind.  There was an error on the current play, and the frat brothers were yelling at one outfielder who was talking on a Blackberry, making some kind of stock deal. Back to my phone call. I then asked Ian what was next. “Well tonight I am pretty pissed off. I think I am going to go smash burritos in the graveyard. Real big fat burritos. That’s what I feel like doing.  I am so pissed I am going to get a big fucking juicy burrito and smash it on the ground, right in Rock Creek Park.  You should come along, hang out with my friends and me.”

Now something told me that he was fucking with me and that there was no party.

“Ok dood, I’ll do that,” I shined him on. Beep. We were interrupted by the auto-voice, “You have 30 minutes left on your call.”

Great, I thought, ok, I am going to ask this dood about the hardcore scene back in the day, and get something for this $20.

“So, give me your perspective on the DC punk scene back in the day?” I inquired.

“Well, um, you know. It was like… Gotta run now. We’ll talk about this tonight.”  He hung up.

That bastard cheated me on my full hour and my real question.  Totally depressed, I walked along, and a couple joined me.  One guy and his girlfriend.

“Hey, can you fix my girlfriend’s cell phone?” the guy asked me.

“Sure,” I said.  He handed me the phone.

“Here, all you need to do is press the button.”  I showed him how to use the phone.

“Radical.  Thanks man.”

“What are you doing?” he asked me.

“Walking home, I’m tired.”

We walked past a church, I went up and touched the door to sense its aura.  It was blue.

“What are you doing?” the guy asked me.

“Checking for its aura.  It gives me a better sense of what the church really represents.”

“Whoa, dude.  Well then, you need to come check out this church.”  I followed the couple to a church.  It was an impressive church.  It had huge bulbous roofs and glass doors.  I went up and touched the door, but I felt nothing.  Weird.  I walked inside.  It was like the lobby of the movie theater.

I tried to walk past the ticket booth just to get a peek at the main auditorium when I was interrupted by a female usher, “Sorry sir, the auditorium is not open now.  However if you would like to see what it looks like on the inside, you may purchase some photos from from the gift shop.”

Never mind, I thought.  This was not a real church, I decided, and walked back out through the way I came.  I noticed however on the bottom of the glass doors was the word “HORTON” but it was in reverse, since I was leaving.  Weird.  Maybe I should start to analyze these dreams.

I grew up in DC in the 80s and went to punk shows all the time, so there is that connection.  Plus I just watched “What We Do Is Secret” so that probably got me thinking about the old days.  Feeling the aura of churches is kind of weird.  Though I have been on a spiritual path for a while now, I’ve become skeptical of some organized religions.  So there is that connection.  The name on the door, Horton, is the name of a friend of mine. I wonder what that means, probably because we’d met at dinner that evening.

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Dream Log June 12th: Zombie Wedding Attack

I was helping my friend James prepare for for his wedding.   I remember feeling honored that he asked me to partake in the ceremony.  However, I was jealous that that I was only a groomsman and not the best man.  Vince was going to be best man, and I hated that. It should have been me.

There was much commotion before the wedding, lots of construction unrelated to the wedding was happening in the house.   In fact it was going to be a miracle if they finished everything in time.   There was scaffolding about, and workers running all around, laying carpet, building walls – it was chaos. I was being fitted for a suit by the house tailor.

I remember being in the main room helping James arrange the flowers.  He stood up a giant maple tree in a pot.   It had little roots and little foliage.   He assured me it would fill out just in time for the wedding, and it was the perfect tree. I could not argue. He told me the main flower arrangement was going to be something like dandelions, and he said it was his favorite.  They were going to be in copper pots.   I thought that was odd.

The day of the wedding I was on a train with members of the wedding party.  We were pulled into the train station.  I decided I was going to hang some of my artwork in another train.  I bolted out of the train, across the platform, and into another car.  I started to bolt my artwork into the ceiling of the train.  I was nervous because two policemen were watching me.   However, they did not seem to care that I was defacing the train in front of them.   I got one solid screw pushed in (where I got an electric screwdriver was beyond me).  Fearful of missing the train, I decided not to bolt the remaining screws in.

I went running back to the other train, but I was too late, it pulled away before I could get on.   I was confused because I was sure I had more time.  It pulled away.  I remember feeling a little nervous because I was unfamiliar with the English train system.   However, I felt comfort in the fact I had a pocketful of pounds and could pay for my way anywhere I needed to go. I went towards the ticket kiosk to buy another ticket.  There was an Asian boy in there, and he was motioning me to step back.  I did.   He was warning me to get off the sidewalk, as it moved whichever direction it needed to move people around, and in a movement it would be moving people from away from the train.  I, going against the grain, was clearly headed for disaster.  I waved, thanking him.

I watched the sidewalk move.  It was fascinating watching the entire platform roll out from the wall.   I was amazed at the british technology.   Once all the people cleared the platform, the sidewalk stopped moving, and I was able to approach the kiosk and buy the ticket.   I boarded the train hoping they would be waiting for me at the next stop.  However, instinct told me they would have gone ahead with their day, and I would be catching up later.

Wedding Day
It was after the ceremony.   We were in the banquet room of the English row house.   We were eating, merry-making, and laughing. Everyone was having a ball.   Then it got dark, and the alarm had sounded.  There were zombies loose in the house. Fuck, I thought, we were unarmed.  This was a real problem.   A real fucking problem. Everyone was panicking.  I was trying to keep my cool, but these people couldn’t and that made me very nervous.  We were accustomed to zombie outbreaks, they were nothing new; however, one generally packed a weapon, but there were no weapons today, not at a wedding. Hubris, fucking hubris. I really felt like a dolt, or as the natives would say, a cunt.

There we were all huddled up in a small banquet room, dressed to the nines, women were crying, and everyone was losing their shit.   There were only two exits to the banquet room.   One: the main entrance to the rest of the manor; and the other was an stairway to the sleeping quarters above.  A few of the men went out to the main part of the house to secure it.   They were fools, they would either be dead or turned in moments.  Fucking amateurs.

We boarded up the main entrance.   We hastily fastened boards, while listening to the screams and commotion coming from the main part of the house.  The horrors, those fools didn’t even last a minute.   We might be ok, I thought, we just need the barrier to hold out until help arrived.   One of the female guests was in a panic and decided to go upstairs.  I don’t know what for, there was nothing there.  We were trapped, plain and simple, I walked out on the balcony to see if there was anyway down.   None possible, we were hundreds of feet in the city, and it too was in chaos.   Helicopters flying everywhere, fires throughout the city.   Man, it was going to be a long night.

I went back inside.   The guest who went upstairs came running back, crying.  She had blood pouring from her head. “They’re upstairs, they’re upstairs.”   Oh fuck, I knew this was probably the end.  We all moved back.   Eyes focused on either entrance to the banquet hall. Pinned in, no placed to go.   The fear grew inside me, my heart was pounding.  Doom was certain.   A pounding started at the newly constructed barrier.   It was slowly starting to peel away, and the pounding grew louder and louder.  It wouldn’t be long.   It wouldn’t be long.

Interlude -> I woke up at 3:00am, and wrote this down. I then had a continuation of the dream when I went back to sleep.

I don’t know how I made it through the night, but I woke in the kitchen, it was dawn. There was a foul stench, the stench of death. A female guest was the only other person in the house.
“Are you going to stay another night?”, she asked.
“I’m not sure.”
I figured the worst was over, and I could definitely use a good nights sleep.
“If you do, make sure you incinerate the trash. You don’t want a repeat of last night.” , she said.
With that she turned and walked out the door. What a cool chick I thought. I looked at the reeking trash, there was a large smear of blood from one end of the kitchen floor to the other. I don’t know what I was going to do.

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June 10th: Effortless Floatation

I Took a nap this afternoon, I was super exhausted. Decided I might try to AP, as It’s less spooky for me to AP during the day. The last very positive experience was during the day. Anyhow, I laid down, did a little meditation. Fell instantly asleep. Got the vibes, nothing to crazy, I didn’t struggle to get out of my body laid there real passive, and let it happen all on it’s own. I noticed my upper torso was out first, which is very interesting because I usually have to struggle to get that part free. That really caught me off guard. Then it happened. Real gradually I slowly started to float up, and I didn’t fight it, and I didn’t try to control it. Then I was thinking down, and gradually, slowly, I started floating down. Then I started floating down, my legs were above the bed and the rest of my astral body was position off the bed. I was thinking the bed would stop me as I floated down, but it didn’t my legs went right through the bed as I moved towards the floor. Real peaceful. As I got closer to the floor I started to struggle, wanting to float back up, but I thought about it too much and it broke my trance. No fear this time, nothing spooky, just relaxation.

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